Wedding Etiquette

I wholeheartedly believe and preach that you should always try your best to be your true self in all social situations – off-beat humour, strange opinions, muumuu’s – the whole genuine, package. How else are you supposed to form any sincere connections otherwise? Drop any acts, and just be you, honey boo boo. However, I also think it’s important to follow some basic rules of thumb to keep from stepping too far outside the acceptable social boundaries. Some scenarios call for certain acceptable behaviours, and definite no-no’s exist. For example, at a work party, don’t hook up with a co-worker, don’t hug the boss frequently, and don’t get so inebriated that you attempt to perform the worm on the dance floor. It’s better to know these things ahead of time, rather than learning these mistakes among friends and esteemed colleagues. Another example of a social gathering that requires a healthy dose of good behaviour is holy matrimony – so without further hesitation – here are the (I) dos’ and don’ts of wedding etiquette. 

• You’re going to be meeting a lot of new people, and you’re all going to be in the same place all day/night – so make a point of remembering their names! Either repeat it back, create a pneumonic device, do what you gotta do, but have your manners on point, y’all.
• Try to avoid irreversible embarrassment. A goofy photo with the bride and groom? Acceptable. You flashing the hired photographer? Gonna haunt you forever.
• Try to avoid embarrassing the bride/groom…too much. Divulging some juicy anecdotes is acceptable, but there’s a line. You’ll know when you have crossed that line when you never hear from said bride/groom ever again.
• Avoid PDA. Public is a no-no (people’s great grandparents are present!), but hell, what you do in the privacy of the stairway with so-and-so’s cousin from Ireland, well honey, that’s your business.
• Be a good sport – sure some wedding games can be a little played out, but this is the first and only time you’re going to play them at your best friend’s wedding, so join in, and contribute to the evening!
• Be ready at a moment’s notice to lend a hand. It’s very likely you won’t be needed, but how great would it be if you could take a little stress off the wedding party?
• Instigate group dancing – these are the memories that will last a lifetime, and the videos will surely be priceless.
• Save the drama 4 yo mama. It’s not your day, so keep your issues to yourself for the time being.
• Speaking of issues, let’s move on to the matter of tissues. It’s not your party, so you can’t cry if you want to. I get it, maybe this wedding reminds you of your own misguided, and thus far unsuccessful search for love. I repeat – it’s not your day – save it for a night of martinis with your other single gal pals.
• Continuing on that train of thought – don’t take advantage of an open bar to drown your sorrows. The open bar is there to encourage lively chicken dances and up-beat mingling, not deep, dark, drunken confessions.
• If I haven’t made it clear yet, the number one rule is as follows – DO NOT STEAL THE BRIDE’S THUNDER. Today she is Zeus, and she is keeping her thunder close at hand. Your day will come. Until then, keep doing rain dances, and one day the thunder will be yours.

Here’s another great playlist that is full of absolutely PERFECT songs for a wedding dance party – c/o the great movie, The Boat That Rocked. Sidebar – if a dude wants to sing me a convincingly sincere version of ‘With A Girl Like You’ sometime, I would not protest. K, thanks.

Go forth – cheers to the happy couple, throw your arms up to Shout!, and don’t lose your cool or act like a fool, up in here.

Header Image: melancholiathemovie.com